Home Alone!

For months, I have been dreaming about have a weekend all by myself. I can watch anything -  I want, I can eat anything  - I want, do all the crafts  - I dream up, sit in silence with no one to take care of, read all day, stay up late and even better sleep in late ect..

 So this past weekend my dream came true. I had bronchitis and my family left for a family funeral and my daughter went to her grandparent's home, since I was sick. Wow, even though I am sick this is going to be awesome!

When you spend your time always on the run, a weekend of relaxation seems to be heaven.

So Friday at 9:30 am comes, the house is empty (except for the dog and I) all I can hear is the clock ticking. By 11:00 am I am ready to go crazy.

Bored Puppy - Caspian Frodo

So the weekend was a time of complete quiet and relaxation. I will be honest  - I hated it. I could not wait till my family came home to make things messing and crazy again. I was bored, yes bored. I thought that is what I wanted time to myself. It was not what I wanted - here is what I learned...

1. SPEAK UP (say what I want): So often in life we go with the flow, we do what our family or friends need us to do. How often do we take the time to see what we need or like? I guess I have not done this enough since I thought I wanted silence - FYI silence drives me CRAZY!! I tend to go with the routine, not thinking about my needs or wants. I found out this weekend all I need to do to feel like I have a say is speak up. If I want pizza for dinner, I just need to say (I am the mom, right!) My daughter asks all the time for special dinners or treats - why can't I?

2. Dream: When you think it is too late to dream, maybe that is a time to start dreaming again. This past weekend I realized I have set my dreams aside for goals. Yes, goals are great, yet very different from a dream. Goals are a list of things you know you can do. Dreams are a bucket list of things you only wish you would someday get to...

3. TV is BORING!: Here, I was hoping to binge watch all the shows I never get time to watch, only to find...I am watching other people having adventures.  Now don't get me wrong I enjoy TV shows, I just do want to ever spend a whole weekend only watching TV. Maybe I need new shows feel free to introduce me to some - taking suggestions :)

4.Grateful:  I am so thankful for the crazy life God has given me. I love working full time even though we need to make sacrifices to make that work for a family.  My husband is gone a lot, and I love that he can life his dream, change people's lives one church at a time, then come home and make our family complete. As my daughter gets bigger her social life is taking off, I am enjoying the time I have with her because she will not be home forever. 

So over all staying home not my dream or how I would like to spend many other weekends in the future, yet now I know that and I can find a new dream to try. 

This week's challenge is do something on your bucket list. Or make a bucket list start dreaming and finding out what you love and what you will never do again.

To Blog or Not to Blog.....

To blog or not to blog...a good question. In this day and age is it "safe" to put yourself out there? Sharing thoughts, emotions and personal details on to the inter-web. I have given it lots of thought through out the years.

For me it is a way to connect with people who I am not always with face to face, for those who know me personally you may see a more reserved person, quiet. Others say I am loud. I am both, I am reserved when it comes to sharing my opinion, and a little too quick to jump in with a joke.

Here are several reasons I decided blogging was for me:

1. I love writing!

2. Vulnerability - Hear me roar (or cry) - This is my way of sharing how I am processing/struggling through something without doing a huge rant on social media. I am not a verbal processor - it takes time for me to share my thoughts and feelings with others. I have found this can often leave you feeling lonely and isolated. This blog helps me feel connect and process through life with others.

3. Other Also Struggle: I know I am not alone in feeling I do not measure up to the world's standard (perfect 2.2 kids, perfect marriage, thin body, outgoing personality with tons of friends ect...) My dream is to show others there is hope despite what they struggles they may have in their life. I also hope you see you are not alone...

4. Life is funny: My life is never boring, I don't think if you looked at life through a blog, yours would be either. I find the humor in life's crazy moments and then share it with you.

5. Faithfulness: I am writing this blog because I feel God has given me different lenses than may "Christians" I know there is hope along with despair, and God is big enough to hear ALL of my feelings not only the good ones.

Thanks to all of you for reading this blog. I have loved the comments and encouragement.
This week has a simple challenge -  God has made us all with different lenses in life - What make you unique?

Rain, Rain Go Away....

Today is a new day....

Easter week is not my favorite week. We celebrate and enjoy time away as a family (which I LOVE), yet since my miscarriage 3 Easters ago, my heart is heavy during Holy week. 

This got me to thinking...how often do we allow our past to sneak in and put a rain cloud over our day full of sunshine? 

I vow to this week live in the moment, enjoy each ray of sunshine (or chocolate bunny - Same thing right) and to look to my Creator for the plan He has for my day. 

Every day is new and full of potential, I may not wake up with more money, a thinner body, bigger home or even another child, yet I will never know what adventure awaits me if I am not willing to look. 

Take a risk this week, live in freedom from you past or present ugly situation. Find joy in everyday things around you and live in the love God sent to us so long ago.

Happy Easter everyone - I pray your week is full of FREEDOM and JOY!

Sam's Short Story - "Dog and his Ball"

Dog was playing with his ball. He was throwing it north and  then catching it. Hamster came over to Dog, "Can I play with you?" Hamster asked."NO" Dog replied, tossing his ball in the air. "Okay!" said Hamster, walking away.

Raccoon came over, "Can I play with you, Dog?"

"NO way!" Dog answered.
As Raccoon walked away Cat walked by, "May I paly fetch with you, Dog?"

"Why would I want to play with you when I am having so much fun without you?" Dog kept throwing the ball in the air.

Dog throw the ball  high in the air, But before he could catch it Owl caught it with his feet. Do you want to play ball? It would be fun" said Owl, throwing the ball to Dog while lowering to the ground.

"NO, no, no, no, I want to play alone" Dog shouted, throwing his ball on the ground.

It was night and all the animals had gone away. Dog throw the ball so hard it looked like a star in the sky, but instead of coming down, it stayed. The ball twinkled in the North direction and it was now the biggest star in the sky.

The next day, Dog asked if he could play catch with Hamster, Raccoon, Cat and Owl. And they played all day with Cat's new ball.

This is how the North Star got there. The rest of the stars in the Big Dipper are all balls from pups who learned different lessons but this the biggest lesson of sharing and it was Dog's favorite ball so that is why it is the brightest in the sky.

By Samantha S