One of These Things are Not Like the Others...

We all want to fit in, be liked and have a "normal" life. For some of us...okay for me it is impossible.

I was an awkward young child, awkwardly quiet and I had a really hard time connecting with peers. This has not changed much for me, I still stand in a room at work and realize I am the odd one out. I am not upset by this in any way, I just work harder.

So the other night we had a huge black tie event at our church. My husband was out of town, so I went alone. Now, yes, there were lots of single people there, not many married singles. You spend the whole evening explaining why you are alone and how you are fine with coming alone. Most people would stay home, I almost did, yet I thought if I had to wait to only do things with my husband who works weekends then I would never leave the house. I am a confident woman who can go out and eat by herself, watch movies by herself and feel confident in her marriage.

This got me thinking about all the things in my life that are odd. The list got too long for this blog to fit them all...I am a curvy woman in a skinny women's world, I am a full time working mom surrounded by SAHMs, I attend many functions by myself despite being married, many people are more educated than I am, and I have only one child. (I could go on and on) - Now this is not a pity party for Jennie, this is a realization that I let these things hold me back. I avoid friendships because of these things, I do not speak up because what I have to say is not relevant, plus I hide my passions/dreams from others who are doing what I want to do because it am not as "qualified"

So here is my question to you: What is stopping you from living out your dreams? What is holding you back from moving further in your career or relationships?

Together let's overcome our oddness! Let's stand together and find that we are unique!

              

God's Got This!

This time last year I was in a dark place.  We lost our dog of 13 yrs on May 11th. He was there when my friends started having babies and I could not, he was there through several miscarriages...I could go on, yet that is not the point of this blog :)

On May 11th, 2017, I was watching our new puppy chase around his birthday balloons as we celebrated his 1st birthday in style. As my daughter and I were planning this day I ask my daughter if she would like to get flowers to s memorialize the other dog's death a year before? She replied "I  have mourned him for a year, I would like to just celebrate." The thought hit me...wow, God had this planned!

God knew before we did what we would need a year later. A celebration of a birthday on the same day of the death we were mourning.

How often do we only see the tragedy, and not see the miracle that God is working in the background. I have taken time this week to think of all the things that have lightened the blow of a bad situation.  Everything from a kind word from a stranger to huge financial miracles just when you need them (not a moment before).

We learn so much from walking through pain, so I do not wish all struggles away. I am a believer that God is creating silver linings for my circumstances. 

So no matter what you are walking through find hope in this simple phrase...God's Got This! He knows what you need to heal, thrive and He loves you so much!

"...weeping may stay for the night,

    but rejoicing comes in the morning." Psalm 30:5  

Mission: Make a Mother's Day She Will Never Forget

This week we gear up for Mother's day. I remember as a 15 year old the idea of some how finding a gift that show how much I appreciate all the sacrifice my mom made for us kids. Wait, let me give some background.

When I was 15 yrs old my dad left 2 days after Christmas, as my parent's marriage had come to a sudden end. (in my 15 yr old mind). My mom was a stay at home mom and never really worked full time out side of the house. In January as we went back to school my life changed so much it still makes my head spin. I went from being a kid to being a responsible adult (again, in my mind). My mom got several jobs and worked very hard to keep food on the table and us in our house.

It is crazy to think that at the age of 42 she started over, she was single, had 3 kids (the youngest was 7), she had never used her teaching degree and had a pile of debt.

I remember so many nights, she would sit at the kitchen table. After a long day at 1 or more of her jobs (she worked 7 days a week) she would be balancing her checkbook, paying bills, and crying. As she cried not realizing we were watching her - she would often be praying. I would hear her sing or pray aloud. At night if she was not working or paying bills she would be reading and writing in her journal.

As a 15 yr old I did not understand the pressure she must of been under to keep it all together for our family, yet I did know I needed to show her she was loved. She may not have the love of my dad any more but the 3 of us kids loved her - so I set out on a mission for mother's day.

Mission Mother's Day: Show mom how much she means to us in every way we can.

#1. Clean the house: Since, I was 15 I delegated this task to my younger siblings - thus maybe not the cleanliest it had ever been - yet they tried....

#2. Breakfast in bed: Yes, the traditional make your mom soggy cereal and burnt toast (or in our case almost not toasted toast - our toaster was not working). I think I also cooked an egg, not an edible one I do know that.

#3. One Dozen Red Roses: I had no car, no money and no idea how much roses cost on Mother's day - yet I was determined! I called every floral shop in the yellow pages. I finally found one who would deliver them to me, without charge. I meet the young man outside my house and paid him in quarters, dimes and pennies - no joke I even had heard you were suppose to tip a floral delivery so I gave him $.50 and some candy. He was so gracious and kind I never thought what I did was odd.

Did I make a Mother's day that was unforgettable for my mom - honestly she does not remember any of this Mother's day. Can I blame her... no she was just trying to survive at this time in her young life.  I think now of how much she sacrificed on a daily basis. How she pulled herself up - worked 3 jobs, went back to college, send all 3 kids to a private school, took us on mini vacations, keep her faith in God even through the lowest moments in life.

She is now a great success in the business world. She is a strong leader and kind friend. She is an amazing mom/mother in law/grandma now, yet I saw her at her lowest point in life - and I saw strength, determination, faith, and one of the hardest working woman, I will ever known.

So matter what this week looks like for you, please know people are watching and learning from you. I hope you can all find a woman to pattern yourself after like I did at 15 yrs old.

Any Excuse for a Cupcake

May is a very special month in our home...our puppy's birthday! Caspian has been in our lives for 8 months now and boy have a learned lots about what I do not know.  First thing I learned quick...he is full of energy and I am not.

As our family starts planning for his 1st birthday party (let's be honest, I will use every excuse I can find to make cupcakes), I started thinking about how much I have learned from Caspian. I thought I would share my nuggets of "what not to do as a dog owner" with you over the next couple weeks.


This week's focus -1. I love ROCKS: 

I love my puppy, yet the one thing that drives me crazy about him is: HE CHEWS EVERYTHING! He finds joy in chewing on anything he can get his paws on. I have often caught him eating small rocks from my daughter's rock collection. He is so excited to get any thing new to chew (like a toddler with a box). This got me thinking about contentment. We live in a world of instant gratification and too many choices, we tend to live in constant lack of contentment, looking for a better rock to chew.

I am learning to be content with the "rocks" in my life. They will make a great foundation for my future. 

If you want to read on how this puppy got into our lives read my blog Muddy Puppy