Should you be in Jail?

Yesterday was a big day in our house...our little girl turned 10. So what did we do to celebrate, go to the MOA, of course. We meet the grandparents there for lunch and then she wanted to do some shopping, so I went to bring the presents to the car. Now we were running late and it was a Saturday at the MOA so we parked far from the door, several levels from where we were shopping. I was carrying  a huge bag. I got around the mall to the parking ramp and realized I had to take several staircases up to the level we parked on, I said to myself, "Come on you lazy, fat bum go up the staircase, you need the exercise"

Now that may seem harsh, yet believe me this is normal self talk for me. Yet, this time, I was convicted - as the thought ran through my mind/heart.
Since, I read a book a month back that said if we followed the verse, "Love your neighbor, as you love yourself" most of us would be friendless and many in jail, I am trying to think of what I would say to a friend.

I have so often thought of this simple thought this past month, if I had said the comment about to my daughter, I may have permanently scared her self image. Then, why do I allow these words to be thought and most of the time accepted for myself.  To be honest, habit and not loving myself the way I know God has designed me to love. I do not have grace for myself and often am frustrating at having to give grace to others for the same thing.

I think I am loving others so much more, yet the fact for me is I only have as much grace and love for them, as I have for myself. I may let their actions go with out harsh criticism in word or action, like I do with myself. Yet do I stand in judgement - honestly- yes. I beat myself up in word and action then judge others for not having the same "self criticism"

Wow that may be too honest and I may lose friends because of that statement, yet I think we are all too guilty of the one or both of those things. I am now aware of my very destructive thinking of myself and others. I am learning to give myself the grace and take captive every thought bringing them before the microscope of would I say this to someone else.

I will leave you with one last thought... would you be friendless or in jail if you treated others the way you allow yourself to be treated?

 * Submitted by a woman who is growing and learning daily to show the love of God to herself and others more everyday. I hope this very vulnerable blog makes you rethink how you talk to yourself or judge others.